


Complete Serendipity & Euphoria (Jikook)

by kpopdreamgirl



Category: Kpop - Fandom, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Army, Baby Jeon Jungkook, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Closeted, Closeted Character, Cute Jeon Jungkook/Park Jimin, Denial of Feelings, Developing Relationship, Dom Park Jimin (BTS), Drunken Confessions, Drunken Flirting, Drunken Kissing, Drunkenness, Eating Disorders, First Kiss, First Love, First Relationship, Flirting, Flirty Jeon Jungkook, Flirty Park Jimin (BTS), Fluff, Fluff and Mush, Friendship / Flirting / Thinking of You Fest, Gay, Gay Character, Gay Male Character, Getting Together, Homosexuality, Hyung Kink, I Ship It, I Tried, I'm Bad At Tagging, Inspired by Serendipity (Music Video), Jealous Jeon Jungkook, Jealous Park Jimin (BTS), Jealousy, Jeon Jungkook & Kim Taehyung | V are Best Friends, Jeon Jungkook & Park Jimin are Best Friends, Jeon Jungkook is Bad at Feelings, Jeon Jungkook is Whipped, Jeon Jungkook/Park Jimin-centric, Jikook Week, Jikook is real, Kid Bangtan Boys, Kim Taehyung | V & Park Jimin are Best Friends, LGBTQ Character, LGBTQ Themes, Love at First Sight, M/M, Male Homosexuality, Mentioned Bangtan Boys Ensemble, Minor Jeon Jungkook/Park Jimin, My First Fanfic, My First Work in This Fandom, Park Jimin (BTS) is Bad At Feelings, Park Jimin (BTS) is Whipped, Park Jimin (BTS) is a Tease, Past Jeon Jungkook/Park Jimin, Romantic Fluff, Secret Crush, Secret Relationship, Sexual Confusion, Shipping, Shy Jeon Jungkook, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Smitten Jeon Jungkook, Soft Dom Park Jimin (BTS), Strength Kink, Sub Jeon Jungkook, Sub Park Jimin (BTS), Temporarily Unrequited Love, Tension, Trapped In A Closet, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Unresolved Tension, bts - Freeform, jikook - Freeform, vminkook
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-01
Updated: 2020-03-02
Packaged: 2020-11-09 07:56:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 9,844
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20850074
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kpopdreamgirl/pseuds/kpopdreamgirl
Summary: "The beginning of it all was messy, confusing and scary, but eventually the passion & compassion we have for and to each other couldn't hide itself anymore, resulting in complete Serendipity & Euphoria."Jimin joined BigHit Entertainment because he always loved performing but what he didn't expect was to find his soulmate, Jungkook. It wasn't immediate and instant, it was a slow burning love story that eventually blew up and infected Jimin and Jungkook and the life around them.In this story it portrays the tension of the two boys and their slow and cautious approach to how they feel about each other.





	1. Introduction

**Author's Note:**

> Dear Jikook lovers,
> 
> This will be the first fanfiction I've written in 4 years, obviously my writing has matured and improved. If my writing's shit or anything don't be afraid to correct or tell me ಥ_ಥ  
I've only recently joined the Army (4 months ago, going on 5) so if I get any facts or timeline incorrect please look over it and forgive me...but also like tell me ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)  
I also have my last term/2nd portion of my last semester coming up, meaning that I'll be writing and updating this as much as my social life and school life allows...I know...a fanfic writer with an active life! How strange... ( ͡ʘ ͜ʖ ͡ʘ)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
> 
> Thank you please enjoy

My relationship with Jungkook has always been one of admiration and idolization. JK being the youngest and me falling short behind him, I subconsciously took up the responsibility to make sure he would always feel loved, comfortable and safe. I was eighteen myself, still a kid, but I wanted to make sure I could be there for Jungkook. I couldn't imagine moving away from my home, the ones I loved and my family, to join a group of boys I've never met before, at the age of 16. I admire Jungkook, even then, he was an amazing singer, could dance better than some of the other members, attractive, had a good body and was adorable and innocent.

During BTS's first debut, I received an extreme amount of comments saying I was chubby and feminine. It didn't help that I had a high pitched voice and that my face & body was still going through changes due to puberty. I know that the other members shared the same amount of worries and horrible criticism but I'm afraid I wasn't as thick skinned, mature and confident as the other guys. It got to me. I started to, in a way, obsess over Jungkook. I was amazed at how much the fans loved him & Taehyung and always took mental notes as to what I can do to better myself.

We shared a bedroom as a band. It was crowded and sometimes uncomfortable but what else does one expect from a newly established company. I had hope for BigHit. I could tell, in a weird way, that we weren't just some kpop boy-band but that we were possibly special, that is what I hoped for. At times I would stare for maximum 5 seconds at the other member’s bodies, to compare and admire their bodies with mine. I liked Jungkook's body the most. That probably makes me a pervert but I enjoyed complimenting him, teasing him, making him shy. His skin looked almost doll like and his small developing muscles and lean body became something I unhealthily strived for. I started to work out more and diet, believing that the fans would like me more if I became thinner or stronger, that they could look at me as if I was a man, that I was masculine and sexy.

For a while, I would tease Jungkook and obnoxiously flirt with him because I though the way he reacted was adorable. He was quite, shy and nervous most of the time. Though despite the teasing, I would always comfort him and make sure he was okay. I felt as if I could easily understand and relate to him the most and that his struggles were mine, as I didn't want him to face them alone. He would beg for independence and for me to stop caring about him so much but I knew that he secretly enjoyed the unfamiliar sensation of someone caring for you like a family since he didn't spend much time with his due to him being sent to the USA for dance practices along with auditions for talent companies, shows and competitions. Jungkook was spoilt by the fans, by me, by the rest of BTS. I'm actually not surprised that he turned out the complete opposite of an arrogant idol. The hard times, discipline and pressure molded Jungkook into a person I suddenly fell madly infatuated with.

Tae, Jungkook and I have always been a sub-unit aside from Hoseok, Namjoon, Yoongi and Jin. We were the youngest, most inexperienced in terms of life and most vulnerable members to the criticism that BTS faced. We, as a trio, stuck together. It grounded me as our friendship reminded me of that which normal teenagers might've had. We were foolish, naive, fresh faced and anxious to what the world had installed for us.

We started to grow a small fan base quite quickly, this drove me and the rest of BTS through the times we wanted to give up, but we prayed and supported each other, even when it felt as if we blamed and hated each other. I joined BigHit because I've always loved performing, I didn't expect to blow up, to find my best friends, to find meaning in myself and to find a family but most importantly and unexpectedly, I didn't expect to find a soulmate. My soulmate, someone whom I've looked up to and admired, someone who I never dreamed of loving, and that is Jungkook. The beginning of it all was messy, confusing and scary, but eventually the passion and compassion we have for and to each other couldn't hide itself anymore, resulting in complete Serendipity & Euphoria.  



	2. Jungkook

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jungkook voice cracks in a middle of one of their songs while performing, he is upset and can't seem to forgive himself. Jungkook consults with Jimin, resulting in Jungkook crying in the mans arms. During the wave of emotion Jimin reveals how he feels about Jungkook. Then Jungkook speechless, Jimin leaves him in the room alone with his thoughts and his confession.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The POV will always be in the title, therefor making the POV in Chapter 2, Jungkook.

Whenever I think of how it all started... I think of that night;

It was just after one of our very first 'big' performances, the group decided to grab some Ramen from the convenience store and we headed towards our apartment. We talked about how cute the fans were, about each others performances and parts in which we think we can improved or worked on. My voice cracked in I Like It and I felt extremely disappointing and ashamed in myself. I let the fans and my band down because I wasn't practicing and training my voice enough. The rest of the members told me it was normal for a persons voice to betray them and that everything was amazing besides that small voice crack. Amazing wasn't good enough. It's probably the perfectionist in me but I know that I can do better it's just I need to push harder.

While the rest of the members ate and talked, I thought of my calendar, scheduling and planning the times in between practices for when I can work on my voice. I must've got lost in my thoughts because Jimin nudged my shoulder, "Are you alright?"

It was annoying that Jimin always knew when I was overthinking or feeling bad about myself.

"Yes Hyung...why you ask?"

"You haven't touched your ramen in almost 2 minutes, you need to eat so you can grow stronger." Jimin placed his hand over my relaxed bicep and softly squeezed it, mimicking the sound of gunshots quietly under his breath, "Pew, pew, pew."

"I-I'm fine," I flicked his hand away and stared down at the bowl of steaming noodles in front of me. Gosh, why does he always tease me, "I'm just tired from today..." At this point I'm sure he'll make an obnoxious comment about how red my ears are and how shy my response sounded.

"Don't worry, being tired is normal especially on such a busy and energy draining day like today, but that's exactly why you need to eat, so you can gain your energy back." He smiled softly at me and pushed the bowl closer to me. I picked up my chopsticks and grabbed a decent amount of noodles and plunged them into the cavities of my cheeks, slurping up the remainder of the noodles that dangled from my lips. In mid chew, Jimin leaned over and whispered into my ear, "You know you can always talk to me, I don't bite. You were cute today." I could feel his hot breath against my neck which sent shivers down my spine.

I chocked on my noodles. It has almost been 2 years since we've debuted and I still haven't gotten use to compliments. The standard amazing, well and good were familiar to me as they were usually applied to my performances but whenever one of my members or one of the fans called me cute, my ears would instantly turn red and I would hide my face out of pure embarrassment. However, when Jimin called me cute or compliment me, I would freeze and my heart would slightly flutter at the sound of cute coming out of a man's lips. Maybe it was because I became so use to his compliments, flirts and praises yet I was always caught off guard.

I was in the bedroom when I was patiently waiting for Jimin to respond to my text, I asked him if we could talk. The rest of the members, including Jimin, were either playing video games or watching a movie that I'm too stressed to watch. Jimin's message was marked as seen and I sat there on my bed waiting for a message back when the door slightly opened and then Jimin's head poked in...why does he never respond to my messages?

"What'd you want to talk about Kookie?"

"I...I feel like I let the band down today," Silence stifled in the bedroom, "That I let the fans who paid for and waited for our performance, I let them all down..." Jimin closed the door behind him and slowly moved towards me, "I disappointed everyone."

I started to tear up after keeping in my thoughts, stress and worries for a couple of months but I couldn't help the feeling of tears prickling my eyes, tempting and fighting for release.

"No...no, no. Jungkookie, you weren't a disappointment. I'm sure the fans didn't take it to heart and I'm sure most of them even thought it was adorable." Jimin dropped down by my side and put one of his hands on my thigh while the other rested behind my neck, rubbing the short hair softly.

"I did...I let you down...I let the whole of BTS down." At this point a tear slipped from my eyes and dripped down the side of my cheek, my hand went to wipe it away but Jimin's hand met face before mine could.

"You could never let us down...especially me Kookie-ah." He rubbed the tear into my face with his thumb and held his hand in place on my face, his small hand was soft and warm.

It felt weird to cry in another man's hands, yet alone to cry in front of the man who always taunts me. I turned my head into his hand and let out a silenced sob. He then proceeded to move close, grasping my small body into his arms. I sat awkwardly in his arms after I realized that this was the longest time we've been in physical contact.

After a while my curiosity got the best of me and I let out a broken cough, "Why?"

Jimin moved his body so that he could see me properly, "Hm?"

I looked up to him, meeting my eyes with those of Jimin's. They were doe like and full of concern, "Why can't I, especially you, let you down or disappoint you?"

The corners of his mouth tugged into a small smile, he held my eye contact, "I think it's because you're the youngest and you still have so much to learn, one should forgive an inexperienced person," He spoke softly, almost in a whisper.

The times when Jimin was nice to me and wasn't mercifully teasing me, made the feeling I get in the pit of my stomach, full if nerves and worries, soften. Knowing that someone cared about me, especially someone like Jimin who I often forget is nice and cares about me the most.

"-but also maybe because I like you. I like you a lot and can't find myself to be disappointed in you..." My body froze, Jimin's voice was higher pitched than normal and his gaze now was focused on his hands.

"You like me a lot? What do you mean by that?" I always knew Jimin would call me cute and say he liked me but I assumed it was either as a joke or meant in a friendly way.

"I know...it's weird. I've been avoiding it for a while, I've felt quite ashamed for the way I've been feeling actually...but I don't see you as a man. In my eyes I see you as you, gender or physical appearances aside, I just like you. And I enjoy the feelings I get whenever I tease you."

My face contorted weirdly under his gaze as his eyes finally and frantically met mine.

"I..Um..." I was speechless.

"I don't expect you to feel the same or to forgive or understand me, but I hope that my confession doesn't conflict with our performances..." The air in the room stifled once again, "I should leave now." Jimin picked himself off of the bed and walked towards the door without looking back at me.

I admired Jimin's boldness and confidence. Even off stage, he seemed to stun. I was left alone in the room, my head thumping with thoughts.

How do I act now that I know Jimin likes me?


	3. Jimin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's awkward tension between Jungkook and Jimin. Jimin gets sick and Jungkook looks after him. They resolve the tension between them and agree to be friends once again.

Things were awkward between Jungkook & I at first.

I would occasionally still tease him but not as often and frequent as I normally would. I don't know why I told Jungkook at that exact moment, that I liked him, but I did. In a way I thought it'd make JK happier knowing that I liked him, but then I remembered that he was still extremely young and awkward at the thought of love, his feelings and how he would react to someone else's would be completely different than mine since he was still figuring out things.

When we weren't forced together in a room, we avoided eye contact and any type of physical contact. This awkward air stuck around and to us like the moisture in humid air would stick to you. Slowly things got less uncomfortable. I would sometimes catch him looking at me, he would instantly look away and act as if he was doing something else that wasn't dazing out on me.

It was the day I got sick that things officially went back to normal for us. I was recently spending more time in the practice room, dancing our choreography over and over again, until I got it perfect. If I wasn't in the practice room, I was in the recording studio, practicing my singing and if I wasn't there, I was sleeping. I hardly had time to sit down and have a proper meal, so often I would forget to eat and not eat at all. My body must've eventually given up as one morning I woke up with a cold. I tried to convince the guys that I was fine and that I can follow through with the schedule that was set up that day. I slowly raised myself up, only to be pushed back down by Hoseok which demanded that I rest and not do anything that would risk worsening my condition.

"Your voice and health are precious and we can't risk it especially in your state." Said Namjoon.

I could hear his concerned voice play over and over inside my head, somehow it was able to block out my usual thoughts of self-pity and worries.

Hours later the boys returned in a sweaty mess, they were almost as drenched in sweat as I was. It was quite comedic. I sat there covered in my cold sweats, not moving a muscle in my body and it appeared as if I just finished practice.

The members took turns to take a shower, starting from oldest to youngest. After the endless sound of the showers on & off drip of the water, the members, one by one, fell straight onto their bed and drifted off into a heavy slumber. I watched this as if everything was moving in x5 speed, while I was stuck in slow-mo.

In my sweaty pool of sick, I wished for sleep but for the life of me my mind couldn't slip into the state of that desired deep sleep. My mind kept slipping from REM sleep to half-awake. At that point in time I haven't consumed anything except my spit that I hoped would dampen my dry throat, in possibly 18 hours. My stomach rumbled and groaned, thinking that I haven't heard it's plea for food even after it's 20th groan that echoed inside of my empty stomach.

The members were sound asleep. I knew this as RM's snores ached and battled the silence that suffocated the room, along with the sounds of my stomach. And during this battle of sounds, none of the members awoke. There was only one member whom was awake, Jungkook. He was just lying there, his chest rising and falling, staring up at the ceiling. He eventually got up, to escape from what I assumed was the dreadful snores. To my surprise he came back, carrying a tray displayed with a bowl of Chicken Jook (Chicken Rice Porridge) and a cup of ginseng tea.

"Here..." He shifted his gaze to my trembling hands so his eyes wouldn't meet mine. A soft, small blush began to speckle in his cheeks. He handed me the tray and I stared at him in confusion.

"I heard your stomach rumble five times in the span of since I've been in this room...also so you can get better. My mom would always make me some type of rice dish whenever I was sick with a side of ginseng tea." He placed the tray on the ground next to my bed and then forced me to sit up, placing a pillow behind me so that I wouldn't be encouraged or tempted to fall back into any of my beloved lying positions.

"You need to eat...that's what you told me. But now you're ignoring what you said and expect me to follow through with your advice that you, yourself don't even follow." Jungkook's voice was filled with concern but didn't fail to express his anger. How does one reply to an angry Kookie?

"So, eat." He picked the tray off the ground, "This is how you got sick in the first place, you over worked yourself and didn't eat enough, causing your body to burnout." He took the spoon that was placed on the tray, took a spoonful of Chicken Jook, blew on it and proceeded to bring the spoonful towards my mouth.

"W-What are you doing?" I felt the blood rush to my cheeks as I carefully shoved his hand away.

"Eat." His voice was powerful, dominant and full of determination. I averted my gaze and accepted my fate.

The whole time, Jungkook sat near my sick body and fed me spoonfuls of Jook and slowly tipped the cup of ginseng tea against my mouth so that I could drink from it. One side of my brain hated being treated like this, it felt like Jungkook was taking pity on me and I felt like a big baby but on the other hand, it felt good to be cared for and fed to by someone, especially someone who I admire.

We didn't speak, that was until Jungkook wiped a bit of rice away from my lips with his thumb. We then connected and stared into each others eyes. After a while, he quickly looked back to the bowl of Jook and I noticed that his ears were now bright red.

"I'm not angry at you Hyung."

"...I'm really sorry Kookie."

"No. Don't be. Thank you. I'm sorry, for being awkward around you. If I can be truthful...I kind of missed your merciful teasing & flirting." Jungkook chuckled and looked up to me with his head bowed.

"Aw! Did Jungkookie-ah miss me?" I said, instantly lighting up JK's face.

"Don't make me regret saying that." He played with his left earring and hit my shoulder softly.

"I missed you too Kookie." I ruffled his hair. I would've made his hair stand up if it was my choice but he pushed my hands away before his hair could get in any kind of that state.

"Friends?" Jungkook stared at me, the corners of my mouth lifted up into a smile. He would always have that warmth in his eyes whenever I looked into them, it's been so long since I've seen it, it felt like a breath of fresh air, to finally and truly meet eyes with Jungkook's.

"Friends."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (A/N: I'm so sorry this is kind of late. I just started school this week and wrote the first two kind of chapters in the middle of the week but since then school has been merciful and has been giving me projects, homework, assignments and tests to study for in the upcoming week. Hope you can forgive me.
> 
> I've been feeling discouraged about writing but I know it's probably just the human in me expecting to see fast results. I know eventually my writing will be appreciated by you guys, and those who are anxious readers, waiting for my next update and chapter, I want to thank you.
> 
> Have a good week and further on. I'll work on Chapter 3 over the weekend, but that's not 100% certain that I'll finish it as I have a school event on Saturday.
> 
> Love you all,
> 
> Ash x (kpopdreamgirl))


	4. Jungkook

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jungkook developed strong feelings for Jimin a year after Jimin confessed his feelings to him. He contemplates often if he should message Jimin nights when he can't sleep, until one day Jimin asks him if he is up. This cements and deepens the feelings he has towards Jimin and the relationship the two have.

It's been a year since Jimin told me his feelings. After we agreed to be friends, things went back to normal and somethings didn't, we were closer than before and the teasing became mutual. However, I didn't really understand it, but I got butterflies in my stomach whenever Jimin teased me and those butterflies grew into a storm, a hurricane whenever he touched me, even if it was slightly.

These butterflies carried the denial of my feelings and avoided thoughts. I didn't tell anyone that my heart fluttered whenever Jimin spoke softly to me, or looked at me with eyes full of concern, even the other members, especially not Jimin. I would get extremely jealous without any reason other than when Jimin flirted or was affectionate with someone other than myself.

I though the way I felt was normal, that it would go away. The changes of my mind and body were confusing, the thoughts I had in the past changed and the thoughts i would weekly had changed frequently but my thoughts on Jimin stayed. My eyes would linger a bit longer and my heart stayed the same fast pace whenever he flashed his smile at me or the other members. It felt childish; liking someone, obsessing, being jealous. Our fans then started speculating us, asking themselves if we were 'real'. This just made my attraction and feelings towards Jimin spiral out of control. He caught me a couple of times, looking at him. I would shy away and blush, then he'd comment about how cute I was. Other times, I'd maintain our eye contact and we'd just stare at each other, smirking, and tension rising between us, only to be broken when someone interrupts us or I get distracted by something. I speculated that he still felt the same as when he confessed to me but then I reminded myself that he's flirty with everyone and I' no exception.

At night, after our moments, I sat wide awake, unable to sleep. I struggle with insomnia, but these days and times whenever we shared a moment, I overthought, created scenes in my head to what would have happened if we never broke our eye contact. I contemplated many times if I should message Jimin. I'd pick up my phone, stare at it for a few seconds, put it down, quickly pick it up again, open my chat with Jimin, type a message, erase it 6 times until I finally look at the time on my phone and decide that it was too late for me to send a message to him and that he was probably asleep. I didn't wish to disturb or wake him.

My hotel room at 2 AM drove me insane, my mind was too fuzzy to play games and I was too afraid of obsessive fans to open my curtains and admire the lights outside of my window. I often just sat listening to music, sometimes if I had enough energy, I'd work out, and often I'd just chat in my group chat of fellow '97 liners.

Jimin started to question if I liked him after he discovered the fan ships. I would tell him to shut up but the other members were quick to tell me to stop being disrespectful. For some reason, Jimin hardly ever scolded me when I was informal, he just ignored me whenever I was, even when I call him, "Jimin-ssi."

One night when I was overthinking I received a message. It caught me off guard as it was quite late. Surprisingly it was Jimin. He stated that he was unable to sleep and if I was awake. I replied staying yes, then he stated that he was going to come and bother me. I responded once again only to be left on read, as always.

This was the start of us sharing a room and during these first occurrences, our relationship deepened and my feelings were cemented.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I struggled so much with this chapter, in general writing and finding time to write. I have exams in 2 weeks and the assignments and other special lovely things have been taking up my time. Sorry for the shortness and the wait of and for this chapter. Thank you x
> 
> Happy birthday to our favourite Mochi, Jimin-ssi! ^-^ 13/10/2019


	5. Jimin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jimin and Jungkook share a cheek kiss backstage at the end of their tours final concert.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for the wait. I've been extremely busy with school and if not school I was being sad over someone who I care about. Enjoy the chapter <3
> 
> I might add another chapter tomorrow as I have exams this upcoming week.  
Love you all, fighting!

Cheek kisses.

I struggled to sleep alone for a long time. I got used to the times spent always cooped up in a small room with the rest of the members when we first debuted. It could be because I’ve always been afraid of being alone, trapped for too long inside my head with nothing but my own thoughts with nobody or nothing to distract myself with.

I was thankful to whoever is above when I discovered that JK also struggled to sleep at night. He had his own reasons but it felt nice to know that I wasn't alone at night anymore. That I got to spend time alone with him. In a weird way, I'm glad that I was depressed that one night when I pulled the courage together to message him. Finally...my affections and admiration's towards Jungkook could be expressed without everyone's prying eyes in the way. We could actually get to know each other, deeply.

Our first kiss happened as if it was a chain reaction that we now slept in the same bed. It wasn't technically our first kiss but it was our first slightly romantic interaction towards each other;

It's the end of the tour, the last night. The fans chanted our names, sang along with our songs, passionately waved their army bombs in the air and cheered with the love and pride they have for us. It was tear-jerking but heart-warming.

As we said our last goodbyes, blew our last kisses and displayed our hearts to the crowd, we ran off stage. Queue the fireworks that decorated the night sky in a display of colours to distract the fans so they wouldn't of notice we have left the stage, we wished the fans to end the night with something memorably happy and not sad. Jungkook and I ran backstage and watched the explosions, out of sight from the fans. We stood arm to arm, shoulder to shoulder, breathing in exhaustion. I looked over to Jungkook. His mouth was open in amazement, hair & face drenched in his sweat, fireworks reflecting in his teary eyes. God, in that moment, I stopped breathing, as if I was staring at a godly creature. His beauty was unbelievable, he just stood there watching the fireworks, yet he looked so breath-taking. I wanted to hold him, tell him that it's okay, that it's over, to cry with him, to comfort his aching body. But I didn't dare interrupt the majestic beauty that was in front of me, not yet, just a few more seconds to admire him.

My body was sore and heavy but it turned to JK as if he was a magnet that demanded my stinging body's attention. I, drunk on excitement and adrenaline, could only think of one thing, to kiss him. My hearts pace quickened as my eyes rushed back and forth to his lips to his own eyes, working up the strength to do it, to do something.

In a spontaneous decision, without thought and care, only want, I grabbed one side of Jungkook's cheek, stood up on the tips of my toes and moved my face closer to his other, pouting my lips. I squished my lips against his flushed cheek. He stood still, tensed, unmovable underneath my hold. I quickly pulled away. My hand which was pressed to Jungkook's unkissed cheek, fell slowly, my fingers softly brushing against his cheek as they settled in the crook of his neck where I then massaged his tensed muscle. He looked at me and then began smiling widely, his nose crunching up as he chuckled. 

The fear that I might've made a mistake, filled and then disappeared from my body. I laughed along with Jungkook, wrapping my arm further around his shoulders and stared up at the sky, admiring the remaining fireworks.

I felt Jungkook's body shift under my arms, turning to face me. I looked at him with confusion, but as one of the many fireworks was set off and rocketed into the sky, Jungkook turned my face and kissed my cheek ever so softly. The said firework exploded in the sky, the unexpected sound of it and the feeling of Jungkook's lips against my heated skin, made me jump. I felt his hot breath against my reddened cheek as he let out a chuckle caused by my terror. He pulled away and I shifted my gaze from the sky to his eyes. My heart, for the first time in a long time, fluttered for Jungkook strongly and the butterflies, that were dormant in my stomach, scattered my insides. The overwhelming desire to kiss and embrace him in that exact moment; with his lips slightly pulled in a smirk, the feeling of ecstasy circling us, adrenaline pumping to my heart, blood full of excitement reaching every inch of my body...god I wanted to.

Jungkook reached forward and moved the hair out of my face and with his slightest touch, I was instantly thrown against my own willpower. I had to hold myself back before the animal that rested inside of me, that craves Jungkook, pounces and attacks JK. 

The sound of our staff and crew broke our bubble, distracting JK. I was fortunate that they came when they did, any second I would've risked everything and kissed him. They directed us towards our changing rooms.

That same night, we talked throughout the night, a buzz of energy surrounding us. We acted as though nothing happened but we both knew that the flame was lit and we had no clue how to put it out. We continued sharing thoughts until the embrace of sleep hit us both and we fell asleep in each other’s arms.


	6. Jungkook

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jungkook gets jealous of how Jimin acts towards another member. Jimin feels bad and asks Jungkook out for dinner.

Jealously.

Our cheek kisses became more regular; in our dorm, back of the car, in the companies rooms, during practice when nobody was noticing or around, backstage. We'd kiss each other’s cheeks, as a way of thanks, as a way of gratitude or appreciation.

Tae caught us when we were hanging in one of the many rooms in the company's building, he asked what we were doing, obviously disturbed and confused into what he just walked into. He looked at both of us weirdly then Jimin explained that we were just kissing each other’s cheeks. I was dumbfounded by Jimin's straight forwardness. I panicked, resisting it, telling Tae that it wasn't how it appeared but Tae just laughed and demanded he gets kisses too.

"Since you two are doing it, I want a kiss from both of you." Taehyung smirked as we stared at him in confusion, "What? You'll kiss each other but you won't kiss mine? Is my cheek not good enough!? Where's my love?" He pouted.

"Uh- I..." I struggled to find the words I wished to say, swallowing hard while I started to burn up in reaction to the awkwardness filling up the room.

Jimin laughed, cutting the tension in half. He leaned forward, falling onto my chest.

"Come on! Kiss my cheeks!" He turned around and pointed at his behind, swaying it from side to side.

Jimin laughed harder, leaning further into my chest. His laughs muffled as he dug his head into my chest. His whole body heaved and vibrated from his laughter, his arms drooped around my shoulders, barely hanging on. The room which was filled with tension now was filled with the sound of a happy Jimin. Tae laughed along, proud of his joke, and eventually I joined in with their chaotic behaviour.

Jimin let go of me, pulling himself up right and walked over to where Tae was standing. Jimin placed one of his hands on Tae's cheek and brought his pouted lips towards the other.

This caught Taehyung by surprise, pulling away from Jimin; "Wha-wha-wha," he stared at Jimin, unsure on to how to react. His hands were out stretched, pushing against Jimin's chest so he wouldn't come closer.

I felt jealousy rise up inside of me slowly. My cheeks burning and hands sweating uncontrollably. I felt betrayed by Jimin. I shouldn't be like this but it got to me; when Jimin was willing to place his lips on Tae's cheek. It made me feel all types of ways, it made me feel as if all the progress we shared meant nothing, that it all was pointless.

I regretted kissing Jimin's cheek back. I tried to walk past them. Tae was standing in the doorway but he blocked my path as he extended his arm to stop me from leaving.

"Where are you going?" Tae asked, one hand on Jimin's chest and the other on mine.

I looked at the two of them and then looked down back at my feet, "Nothing." My voice was small and came off cold.

"Aw...Is Kookie-ah jealous?" Jimin shoved Tae's arm away from him softly, and took a step closer to me.

Tae laughed and began to hug my side despite my resistance. I looked over to Jimin, smirking. The corners of his mouth pulling into a smirk that made him look 5 times sexier but also 5 times more mischievous. He moved slowly towards me, him staring at me like I was his prey. He ruffled my hair then followed Tae and began hugging me.

Jimin's heart was beating rapidly, his chest was pressed against my arm and I could feel it, his heart. He nuzzled his face into my shoulder. I can't imagine that it was comfortable.

Tae shifted awkwardly, possibly wondering how long we were going to hug. Luckily, for him, Jimin pulled away and went back to teasing, Tae followed.

“Jungkookie-ah...are you that possessive of me?" Jimin lowered his tone, pouting his lips and started to display the look a puppy could only master, but he managed to mimic it perfectly.

I rolled my eyes and let out a short, half-hearten laugh, my tongue poking against my gums in annoyance.

"You can kiss me too Jungkook, if that's what makes you feel better -- that's what I wanted in the first place." Tae pinched my cheeks and I quickly swatted them away.

The teasing carried on but it seemed as though they were just saying things not specifically aimed towards anyone in particular, laughing at their own jokes. I got bored eventually and attempted to escape the room. Jimin stopping me this time. He jumped forward and clinged onto my back, putting all his weight down onto me, hugging me tightly, pulled me back. I pushed back for just a second, Jimin's feet nailed to the floor, refusing me to not go. I knew I was stronger than Jimin and that I could've easily escaped his hold but I didn't want to hurt him.

I allowed Jimin to pull me back into the room, forcing me to walk further away from the door. His body was pressed against mine, the lack of personal space made me feel a bit buzzed, the feelings of jealousy lessened and the feelings I had towards Jimin scattered in my mind.

He let go of me and went back to Tae, whispering in his ear. Both smirking at me, creeping closer.

I stood, unaffected, not surprised by this weird secretive behaviour. They pounced at me, grabbing me each by a side and slammed their lips onto my cheek. I felt Tae wanting to laugh, his lips curling into a smile. However, Jimin was calm, pressing harder onto my cheek, his one hand pressing down my shoulder for support so he wouldn't have lost balance as he stood upright onto his toes in order to meet my cheek.

Jimin and Tae pulled away, before they did completely, Jimin kissed my cheek again, quickly and softly. Tae's laughter echoed in the room, stopping my mind to just process what happened.

I wanted to grab Jimin and push him against the wall, demand him to tell me why he teased me like that, warn him to not make my heart flutter again or else I might do something out of my control...but I didn't, I didn't wish to hurt him.

Tae eventually left the room, after we joked and talked a bit more, this left Jimin and I alone.

I looked over to Jimin, he was looking at me, this time he wasn't smirking but instead smiling apologetically. He began hugging me from behind, dropping all his weight onto me again.

"Shall we go?" I asked him, feeling him nod against my back. We walked out together, Jimin clinging onto me.

"Hey Jk..."

"Yes Jimin?"

His voice was low in a whisper, barely audible, "You do know I was teasing you back there right?"

"I know." A smile tugged at the corners of my mouth. He knew I was jealous and offended. Jimin felt bad, and for some reason this sparked a bit of pride inside of me.

"Then what was that back there?" His mouth was close to my neck, his hot breath prickling my skin into a million dots.

I went silent, unsure why I acted that way in the first place, how does one explain to another when you don’t know yourself. We walked down the hallway, nearing where the rest of the members were, Jimin still stuck to me like glue. He didn't pry an answer out of me and respected my choice to stay silent.

"Let's get some meat and beer tonight," Jimin said, breaking the silence, "Just us. My treat, an apology."

Jimin always treated people to a meal whenever he felt guilty, using it as a way of an apology. This time however, it felt different, the way he asked it, 'just us'. I pondered for a second to whether I should accept or reject his offer just to play hard to get. I was about to say no but I did truly want this to be over with and to just hang out with Jimin.

It occurred to me we probably wouldn't be able to go to a restaurant alone together, that our managers had to come along, making sure we were safe. I wanted to go out together, just the two of us, like normal friends. I wanted to drink together outside of our dorm but realistically we wouldn't be able to get wasted at a restaurant with our managers looking over us. We'd be alone in our booth, but our managers would check up on us.

"We going to have it at the dorm?"

"No. We shall go treat ourselves at a restaurant. I'll ask one of our staff to book for us. We can drink at home but with the meat, meat doesn't taste the same at home compared to a restaurant." Jimin let go of me and now was walking confidently next to me, laying out the plans as if he could see them right in front of him.

I laughed at him, "Jimin, what about -"

"We. Are. Going. To. A. Restaurant." He interrupted me, putting emphasis on all his words.

"Alright, alright...we'll have dinner at a restaurant." I laughed at him and rolled my eyes, "Now let’s go." I dragged him into the room, his face beaming with happiness and confidence.

I looked at him, in awe of him being so effortlessly graceful.

I'd do anything for him just to see him smile as happily as that.


	7. Jimin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jimin and Jungkook return from a restaurant, drunk. They return to their dorm where they decide to play never-have-I-ever.

That night was when our love for each other bloomed. The stars aligned and we thrived.

'Jungkook...I - am - telling - you," I said, pausing between each word to add emphasis, "Tae almost died!" I shouted, laughing as I nibbled on some meat.

"I know Tae's a clown but I'm 100% sure he didn't slip on the stairs backstage! I call bullshit! If he did, it would've been as a joke!" Jungkook laughed, pointing his chopsticks at me, waving them around, and displaying his sass.

"Aigoo...JK!" I softly shoved his shoulder, resulting in him chuckling.

"Aigoo, JK!" He replied, mocking and mimicking me, I laughed harder.

We continued to banter, buzzed on Soju and beer, on whether Tae actually slipped on the stairs or if he just did it as a joke to make me worry unnecessarily, it didn't matter now.

We finished eating and now were enjoying each other’s company, rambling aimlessly about pointless topics. One of our crew interrupted us, telling us in advance that we need to wrap it up.

Making our way out of the restaurant, following the crew to the car while leaning one each other for support; we hummed our songs and laughed obnoxiously at our drunken state. 

We received a warning in the car, telling us to straighten up and to not drink so much next time. JK whispered something under his breath as a response, I giggled, reaching over to put my hand on his shoulder, before it did JK made another joke. My hand fell on Jungkook's thigh as a result, it staying there as I laughed harder at Jungkook. I felt him tense underneath my light grasp, I rubbed my hand up and down his muscly thigh softly for reassurance that it's okay. The car fell silent. I wondered how JK felt, I'm boozed up and I'm sure he is too. My actions, unfiltered and raw, caused tension to buzz around the air that surrounded us. JK eventually relaxed, exhaustion hitting him as he leaned his head against my shoulder.

We reached the dorms, our crew members leaving us, left to think and act independently. We crept through the quiet dorm, grabbing two more beers before we retreated into my bedroom. We downed half of each of our own before we decided to play a game of never-have-I-ever.

Our world was spinning and I lacked in decision making but gained in confidence. JK and I sat cross-legged, facing each other. He started off easily, "Um...never have I ever grew out my hair." 5 fingers remained, both him and I.

"Do you want to?"

Jungkook shrugged, "I could always try it."

I smiled, "You should, and you’ll look handsome."

The game continued, every time we lost a finger we'd take a gulp of beer. Eventually we had no more fingers left and were now just doing it to find out our secrets and to get to know more than what we already knew about each other.... and then the question popped up.

"Okay, okay!" JK said after taking a shot of his beer, "Never have I ever liked someone?" We took our gulps in synth.

"That's such an easy one, stupid! Of course we'd both have liked someone." I chuckled, both of our eyes were glossy and we automatically locked eyes. I decided to break the tension.

"Never have I ever been in love," Still keeping eye contact with JK, I took a shot. He blushed, averting his eyes.

Jungkook moved his hand to rub the back of his neck, "What does it feel like? You know, love?"

I leaned back, taking a moment to think, "You feel...euphoric, especially when you're with or around that person," I stared at him, mischievousness pulling my lips into a smirk, "It feels as though it's just you and them, everything dissolves and nothing else matters. You can do everything or nothing with this person and you'd still enjoy yourself and think it's the most amazing time ever," My eyes shifted to his lips, "You want to kiss them... hold their hands... hug them... tell them you love them...touch them," My eyes met his again, "-but you can't."

JK gulped, and leaned his head back, taking a shot of booze, "Looks like I'm in love." He laughed. After a few moments of silence, he spoke, "Never have I ever kissed someone, like properly kissed someone." He watched me intently as I took a shot alone, this surprised me.

"You've never kissed someone?" I placed one hand on his thigh, shocked, mouth agape as I awaited his answer.

"No...I joined when I was young remember?" He shoved me jokingly, "Meaning no one has touched these precious lips." He dragged his thumb over his own lips lightly.

"Those lips are far from precious! Have you seen mine?" I licked my lips, smirking. He looked at my lips, stared at them for a few seconds, scoffed and then took a sip of his beer.

The room fell silent again. He stared at me, opening his lips as though he was about to say something but decided against it. Eventually he spoke, "How does it feel?" He smirked, "to kiss someone."

"It obviously feels good, I mean if it didn't feel good then people wouldn't do it. It's like all your emotions and love for that person is finally being released. You feel confident and loved and once again, you feel like you're in your own world with just that person...but then again everyone experiences it differently so I'm not sure, I don't know, go find it out!" I awkwardly laughed.

He blushed hard. Our eyes connected again, this time JK making sure to not break his gaze. The blush that speckled on his cheeks changed to a look of confidence, the smirk that decorated my face now decorated JK's, leaving me with hot cheeks. I contemplated if this was the appropriate time to admit my feelings towards him, but I decided against it. Was it the booze? The moment? The time? The energy felt electric, causing my skin to break out into many small little bumps, my hairs standing on edge.

Jungkook looked me up and down, I held my breath.

Is this what a deer feels before it gets driven over? I wanted to run, but was solidified in his presence. Wrapped in the scent of him. Headlights screamed at me, silencing me and making me feel weak before him. This was dangerous.

He shifted closer, tucking some of the hair that fell in my face behind my ear. His hand lingered against my cheek. Our eyes holding each other’s gaze, my heart practically jumping out of its place where it rested inside my chest. He rocked slowly, closer and closer to me, our eyes shifting between each of our lips to our eyes, looking for any type of uncertainty. His lips were slightly open and I licked my lip quickly. Panic then shocked JK into shyness, causing him to pause just inches away from my face. I wrapped my hands around JK's head and slowly curved and moved my head closer to his until finally our lips touched.

He kissed back.

His lips soft and kisses innocent. I craved him more than I ever had before and I kissed back a little harder, causing JK to follow my action. Butterflies and ecstasy polluted my body. Our world dissolved into one another, JK's hands dropped, resting on my hips. We finally kissed, and it was more than I could ever described. His lips felt good laid against mine, our bodies and mind heavy with connection, our lips moving in a rhythmic passionate dance and he left me breathless. He pulled me closer, his strength overpowering me. Reality set in and shock stunned me back to resisting the only thing I wished for, for so many years. I pulled away, retreating my hands, grasping onto JK's hands to stop him but mostly to stop myself before I lifted up from the bed to a place where none of this existed. My cheeks were flushed with JK's, our lips parted, panting at the forbidden act we performed.

No. No. No.

This was not happened right now, I must've been dreaming, this is fake, this is just- we kissed. JK could sense the panic that was filling my body, tensing up under his grip on my torso. I wanted him but this is wrong, I shouldn't have kissed him, what's wrong with me. My mind was cursing at me, debating with itself, alerting thoughts of the future occupying my head. A part of me wished to pull away, the other was to bring Jungkook closer and serenade him with my lips against his. However, I didn't dare move. I was torn between wanting to act on my desires or to run far away from them.

Jungkook decided for me, tightening his grip on my hips. He leaned forward, causing me to pull back from him, lowering my head with uncertainty. He giggled, and ducked his head so that he would be able to place his forehead against mine. He waited for me to ease and moved both our heads up, as if foreheads were stuck together and this was the only way we could move. Our noses met, and he slowly moved his lips towards mine. I swallowed my thoughts, allowing JK to be in charge of whatever happens next. His lips hovered just over mine, his breath hot against my pink lips. He waited again, making sure that he wasn't pushing too far and after he was sure I processed what was happened, he connected our lips again. This time kissing me ever so gently and softly for me to calm down the nerves spread out inside my body like a spiders elaborate web. He tore that all down, washing out my fears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry I haven't updated this story in ages. I was writing exams and then my life just got a hold of me and I couldn't find the time to write a proper chapter. I wrote this chapter about three times on four different pieces of paper and I struggled to find all of them as I'm super disorganized. I hope you enjoyed this chapter <3
> 
> Will write and update soon x


	8. Jungkook

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jungkook struggles with his thoughts about last night. Unsure if what happened the other night was reality or just a fantasy. Until one day when the group was walking to a stadiums green-room and Jimin & Jungkook were following behind, Jimin grabbed Jungkook and kissed him, cementing his ideas that it was in fact reality.

We didn't say anything at first...after that night. It felt as if I was just dreaming, that surely this wouldn't have ever happened, but my body's reaction whenever Jimin was near told me differently. My stomach would turn itself inside out, my head would fuzz and I started to sweat.

I would panic a little, unsure if I convinced myself so much that my body was pulling a placebo effect. I would start hoping that he'd do something, say something, anything just to confirm or deny about the things that happened that night...but he did nothing, acted as if nothing happened. It annoyed me. It was unfair how I felt; confused, unsure of what reality was and what wasn't. Like the look Jimin gave me from head to toe one practice, or the gazes he'd send me, flirting with his eyes. Surely Jimin must've felt how tensed I was, he must've felt something too right? I wasn't the only one who wanted the other desperately, surely?

My doubts and thoughts were silenced when one day when we were walking to the green-room of a stadium we were preforming at the next day, Jimin and I were following behind, he suddenly grabbed me aside in a hidden away corner and proceeded to smash his lips into mine. His cherry lip balm filling my taste buds with a familiar fruity flavour. It came suddenly, surprisingly, taking me aback. Eventually I cooled to the sensation of Jimin's lips on mine. His heart beat frantically through the thin material of his shirt against my chest. His hands trembling as they held my head in place.

Almost drunkenly, I slowly trailed my hands towards his waist, gripping slightly at his grey shirt. This might’ve snapped him out of his trance as he pulled away me almost instinctively, looking back at me with flushed cheeks and dazed eyes. He bit his bottom lip, smiled and walked away.

I was more confused than I was before. I was frozen in place. A smile spread across my face ignoring my cluelessness, my hands reached up towards my lips to wipe the buzzing feeling and taste of Jimin against them. They felt wet and hot to the touch. As if checking my temperature I reach to touch my boiling cheeks which I was sure were red.

Jimin must’ve noticed I wasn’t following behind him as before I could even pry myself off of the wall, a giddy Jimin pulled me away from the moment to follow the hoard of our companies people, "Come on, we still got things to do!"

As I trailed behind Jimin, it felt as though I was walking on feathers; nothing but clouds above and below me. I felt excited and happy but as soon as that thought popped up so did the realization that I was also walking on egg-shells. We had no way in knowing what would've happened if someone caught us right there. I wanted to scream at Jimin, tell him how stupid he is to attempt something like that, hit him for making me feel this way but a part of me wanted him to hopelessly silence me with his mouth, wanted him to soften the hits I inflicted on him by biting me back in return.

I couldn’t get him out of my head, run away from these thoughts. I knew I had to focus on work, to get business done first but I just couldn’t. I couldn’t get the thoughts of Jimin acting like nothing special just happened. Hell, he acted differently whenever he was working and what else did I expect, that that's the exact attitude he used on me whenever these moments happen: his work attitude.

The patient, determinated, hardworking, soft but strict, never fool around character that was Jimin's work attitude. Once again, he drives me insane, like a dog on heat, I want him to touch me, hold me, kiss me, protect me, support me, notice me! His scent lingered in my nostrils, his body aware in my sight.

It felt strange being dragged by Jimin just moments after we kissed, to attend to our stylists who'll make us up and to communicate with our best friends. It was strange that Jimin risked it all just for that brief moment, that brief second, to kiss me.

All I knew clearly was that it was real, that night, it was real. I knew that he remembered and at least I knew that it was no longer a mistake, an awkward encounter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there, I'm sure you're wondering what happened to me. What happened to this fanfiction. If I gave it up, or if I forgot about it. But in fact I haven't had the time to sit down and write about Jikook's love life, and if I have found the time I felt uninspired. I felt bad that this chapter which I wrote sometime last year before New Years sat in my journal, incomplete and short. I wanted it to be longer, more powerful, more content, it feels like just a filler so I apologize. I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I'll try my hardest to make time in between my studies, my 8 subjects, my love life and my social life. I hope you had a good New Years!
> 
> Love, Ash


	9. Jimin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jimin and Jungkook talk about their relationship and what they should do about it.

Although our kisses are short, they spark a new found emotion inside of me that I can't quite explain, to anyone, not even myself. Risking things, breaking the rules, going against what's "normal". It has all...become a drug and although I've been told drugs are bad for you, I just don't see how this one could be. Backstage, rehearsals, practice, lunch breaks, training; anywhere as long as we were alone. They, the kisses, were rushed, short, sloppy and often desperate. I thought things were finally okay, normal, silenced.

It was after a long day when I realised things, Jungkook and I were exhausted, he came over to my room just after we were done with rehearsals. After he finished showering, I showered. The hot water soothing my aching body. Showering was the only time I got to relax and reflect. Stepping out of the shower, the cold air sent my skin into tiny bumps. Dried, dressed, and tired, I wanted to sleep. Jungkook, sat across my bed, his attention directed towards me despite scrolling on him phone.

I slowly approached the bed, climbing onto the bed and quickly grabbed Jk's phone, sitting on it to stop him from getting it.

"Jimin! Give it back." He laughed.

"Never!" I giggled, squirming beneath him as he tickled and poked me.

He grabbed my wrists, pinned them to the bed. Our giggles softened, his smile turning into a straight face. His breath heavy, just inches away from my face. Jungkook's eyes searching mine, darting between my lips back to my eyes. Then suddenly he kissed me, our lips intertwining with each other’s.

I felt my cheeks heat, the warmth radiating off of me. I kissed him back harder, more desperate. Before I could think twice he's tongue pressed against my mouth, opening and mixing with my own. I wrap myself around him, my legs in a jumbled mess with his, my hands draped around his neck. I wanted him to have me, right then and there.

Suddenly he pulled away, "Fuck," He breathed heavily, peeling himself off of me, "Jimin... we need to talk."

Oh no. Oh God. Oh God no. The phrase I dreamt about in my nightmares, wished would never fragment has become alive, has just become reality.

"Talk about what?"

"About us Jimin, don't play coy." Jungkook sat on the opposite side of the bed now, staring seriously at me. I proceeded to sit cross legged, playing with my thumbs as though I was a kid in trouble.

"We can't keep doing this Jimin...” Kook sighed, his voice full of regret and sadness, full of sympathy and understanding...soft, full of affection.

"What?" I asked even softer, less of a question or accusation and more as genuine sadness. I was unsure how to feel, it felt as though my blood was boiling, my whole world folding in on itself, a house of cards, I was fragile, he can’t just do this.

"You know what! We can't keep doing this...Kissing! Secretly seeing each other and just hoping somebody doesn't catch us! We can’t keep it up like this. We can’t keep risking it. It's dangerous." His voice was louder now, forceful, stern, demanding.

I stayed quiet, unsure of what to say or how to respond. Even if it is as stereotypical as it is, I felt my heart break slowly. My heart slipping out of his hands like sand.

"Fuck Jimin..." He brushed his hands through his hair, then shifted closer to me, placing a hand over my two fiddling hands, "I really want to do this but we have to be more secretive...I don't want to lose this, whatever this is. I just know I like you Jimin. The last thing I want is for us to get punished for this."

"Why'd you do it?" I said, looking up, stating straight into Jungkook's eyes. He cocked his head to one side, unsure of what I was referring to. God could he be any cuter?  
"Why'd you kiss me just now...why'd you have to go to the next step?" I smiled, thinking back to the moment.

Another sigh from Jungkook, "Jimin...it's not that I don't want to do this with you, it's not like I want to give us up. Us, Jimin. Sometimes we'll have to do the opposite of what we want. We could be more careful, remind ourselves to not delve into each other whenever we are near...only in the privacy of our own rooms we can be who we truly are," Jungkook grabbed both my hands, smiling insanely at me.

"The privacy of our own rooms at least. I agree, if we keep doing this we'll eventually get caught and especially since we both don't want to pull away from each other. Just please don't turn away from me Kook." I leaned into Jungkook, my mouth equally as parted as his but before we could kiss he pulled away from me.

"We need to learn self-control." He smiled, lifting his hand to my check. Slowly he pressed his forehead against mine, I averted my eyes, afraid to meet his.

"Okay...We can't let the others know. Not now. If they find out they might tell the company or stop us or make things awkward," I quickly said.

Jungkook giggled, finally pressing his lips into mine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry if this chapter is badly written or extremely fast pace. Don't give up on me just yet x


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